!*$&)*^%#@!&%^!!!!!!

Well, after yet another long slumber, I'm back again. I didn't forget I had one of these, and I'd thought of it most days...but I just couldn't bring myself to it. Somehow I was convinced that I had deeper issues in my own head to sort out, and that blogging wouldn't help. I don't have a very difficult life, but blessing or curse, I tend to be affected by things a lot more than most...at least much more than just about everyone I know. Supposedly I'm strong, but when it rains, it pours, I suppose. I don't let people in very easily, and I usually disregard things...but when I really take the time out to really care about someone....well, I really, really mean it when I do. I'm not two-faced, and I can't deal with people who are. I don't have that kind of time to waste. Basically, I guess what I'm trying to say is that I choose my friends wisely. Yeah, it doesn't always work out, but when I consider you a good friend, that means a lot more than just being someone that I can usually tolerate.


ANYWAY....

I explained myself there because I've been wracking my brain lately, and everything really fell through for me on Tuesday.


Up until 6th grade, I was in a school that consisted of two classes a grade, Kindergarten to 5th grade, and about 20-30 kids in each class. In elementary school, only people from my little insignificant, pathetic excuse for a town went there. I always had a "best friend" of sorts, and my current "best friend" who I've been friends with for a long time does live in my town, about 3 blocks away. But, overall, I never got along very well with the kids in my town...I was, for lack of a better word, "misunderstood"? So, when I got to the middle school with about 1,000 kids and three other larger towns merging with us, it was a new experience. Through that experience, I found most of my now closest friends by the end of 6th grade year, and since then, not much has changed between us. When I left the middle school this past June, I lost a few close friends to another public high school, and another couple to private Catholic high schools...but, lucky me, the majority of my close friends were to go to high school with me since they conveniently live within the same area which goes to my school.



welllll....


Our high school now has approximately 1600 kids. It's a fairly big school, two floors...but not that big. Well, y'know that other, more suckish, further away school I mentioned that a few close friends go to? They have about 1200. People on the school board now seem to believe it might be a "good idea" to take the people from this town in which most of my closest friends live-those who are not only coming in as freshman next year, but also CURRENT freshman(that's us)-and dragging them to that OTHER school for the last three years of their high school lives.


...look, I can live without my friends always by my side. In fact, one thing about me is that I adore my alone time...I know way too many people who are too insecure to deal by themselves....but, like I said, I choose my friends wisely. And, I will be so heartbroken if I don't get to see them. Yeah, if they're good friends, I'll see them...but, we're busy for high schoolers. Most of my friends and I all participate in something...sports, music, whatever....and most of us are fairly driven and into our education. I already have enough trouble seeing my "other school" friends...I do, but it's tough and confusing, and I barely get to see them. So, there is a verrrrry, verrrrry good chance that this may happen by next year, and it really hit me the other day. I was banking on having them until the end of high school. I'm not intending on staying where I am for much longer than I have to, but the close friends I have are genuinely important to me, in a practically family-esque way....I wasn't expecting to be with them forever, but I was banking on it for the next three years of my life. I'll miss them so much if they do this. There's a town meeting about it tonight...I guess we'll see.



I hate venting to the world about stupid crap, but I guess I just needed to get that out.


There's other stuff going on in my life right now, but this is the main thing that has me worried at this moment.



If you made it this far, thanks for reading <3 ahahaha, maybe now I'll start blogging, in a non-worried/sad/concerned way.

Least Favorite Word of the Day: REDISTRICTING.

S**t, I made the Yankee hat more famous than a Yankee can.

Whoa...two days in a row. Not bad, huh?

I barely had any homework today, so here I am.
Honestly, for all Honors classes, I sure do have it easy.


Believe me...I'm not implying that what we do is extremely difficult and I'm just above and beyond it. Pu-LEASE.


It's just that...I don't feel like much that we do is too challenging. I went into this school assuming the worst, I guess....

I just thought I would suffer now and focus on my schoolwork, and that it would pay off later.

It will pay off, but I seriously doubt that the work that we're doing at the moment is what gets you into a major IV League university.

On another note, today was the beginning of...

Spirit Week. Woot.


Freshman class DID win 2nd place for hallway decorating though, and that hasn't happened once within the past 10 years or so. Guess that's not bad.

I was never into school spirit. I'm still not. BUT...I had fun with it anyway.

So today, to start of "spirit week", it was hat day. I wore my Yankee cap and got scrutinized and harassed by the swarms of stereotypical Philly fans I'm surrounded by on a daily basis.


Ah, well. I'm used to it, believe me.


I love my English teacher, but she hasn't given us ONE writing assignment yet, and I'm itching to do SOMETHING.


Because my English teacher is the "Freshman class advisor" or something along those lines, she was in charge of the hall decorating this weekend, and she was so happy with the turnout and the results that we had a free period today, which was WONDERFUL.


(I know, I just got done complaining about not having work.)

It was 42 minutes filled with sexual innuendos and stolen items. Yeah...what a day.
That was my everyday last year since I got to sit with the guys at lunch. Now in this big, stupid school, we have screwy schedules and different lunches. I miss those ridiculous, 'eff my life' moments, and at this point they come only once in a blue moon. So, I enjoyed myself.


My mommah's dragging me to ShopRite now, have to go. :)

Another "Revelation"? *rolls eyes*.

Hmm.
So, I disappeared, yet again. But I'm back. :)



Remind yourself never to rely on me for anything, right?



I guess I just needed to sort things out in my own head.
I mean, I don't have any more problems than the typical freshman girl,
I'm just...



....intense.


I'm in tune with emotions. You give me a situation, I focus on the "feel" of it.
I'll probably like a song because of the energy of it and how I can relate.

I know I'm not the only one, we're just few and far between at this age.

Anyway, I've just been sorting things out.

I could go on for hours about my conclusions, but I'll give you the short, vague version for now:

I've realized that not EVERYTHING has a deep-seated, complicated underlying meaning.

Even the most mature and conscious of people don't always, always, ALWAYS think layers and layers below the surface, and not everything that happens around you is a sign.

I've learned to let go a bit. I haven't changed, and I still resort to old ways. ^^^....

but I'm not so tense. I feel like I'm back to being me again.

Not that I ever stopped...I just feel less rigid, less stressed...just a tad less serious.


Like I used to be.

So, that's a good deal off of my shoulders now.
I feel like I can live in both worlds again.
Seventh grade was one extreme, eighth another...ninth seems
to be working out as a decent midpoint.


.....then again, it's only been a month of high school.

SO much more stupid crap is bound to happen.
Last year the "drama" only really started in October.

Hooray. Something to look forward to, right? ;)

Ahh well, sleep is calling me, I'm so bushed.
School in the morning. It's hat day.


Yeah. Go Mustangs.

She LIVES!

Salutations...I can promise you this much: I didn't die. I'm still here, completely unharmed...physically anyway. :) Yeah...I disappeared for a while...unfortunately, I didn't have much time to focus on typing away at these keys for a while.



I wanted to make sure I kept up with this blog, simply because I want to prove to myself that I can....consistently. Apparently I already lost that fight, but I'll make up for that.



Hopefully.



I'm a fairly scatterbrained individual, so I'm constantly coming up with new ideas and feeling sudden inspiration...





but I have issues with completing them.



So this was just another exercise for me to begin working on that.



ANYWAY...



I went through with orientation...

I finished my 500 page novel within a few days...

I began waking up at five o'clock in the morning because I am soooo very slow in the morning...

and I walked through the doors of Triton at 7:15 on the morning of September 3rd, 2009.





And so, here I am. Tomorrow is my sixth day of school. I'm pretty used to it already, to be honest. My classes are scattered to the point where I wonder if they simply are finding ways to torture me, but I haven't needed to peek at my schedule since the first day. I have a freshman class of 405 at the moment, plus the sophomores, juniors, and seniors...it's certainly an interesting commute to my classes. Ah, well...I'm rambling now, and I'm pretty delirious...tomorrow's Friday, so I'll have more time for this and will be much less...unsettled. I'll fill in the blanks later. :)

A Lack of Excitement, Inspiration...10 days.

Guten Morgen :) That last post was basically rambling about the ridiculous things I do with my friends, so I'm going to follow that a little bit differently. Okay...here's how it is...

Basically, I'm counting down the days until high school. I start on September 3rd(before Labor day for once), and my summer is no longer filled with excitement. At all.
Now, I'm basically spending my time babysitting, reading my assigned book and making sure my math packet is complete(which shouldn't be difficult because the people going into Honors got less summer homework than those just going into Advanced Placement :D )

SOOO....

I've got school shopping to do, and I have a freshman orientation at 6:30 this Wednesday. I'm psyched, because I get my schedule....but not much more excitement here, except for me dying my friends hair, it coming out differently than intended, but her(luckily) warming up to it.

But that's not exactly excitement, now is it?

So, I have to apologize, because any of the posts that really have to do with my life are very likely to put you to sleep for the time being.

The sad part is that I JUST STARTED the blog, and it's already dragging...

But I'll get inspired soon, and you'll get the other end of it, I guess.

Danke :)

Sisterhood of the Traveling Bear...?(11 days left.)

"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked."-Bernard Meltzer.

Okay...so, yesterday was a fairly decent day. My "sister-from-another-misters"(as they would call themselves) and I spent four hours at the mall. I got to take time out of my mind; no thinking, no technicalities for once. I don't have those days often. One of their birthdays was the 17th, another the 20th, so we figured we'd celebrate this way. So, we could've sworn that we'd seen the guy that I liked for well over a year with his now-girlfriend on the downstairs level....whatever. I forgot about that, even though it kinda got to me. There's more to the whole thing with him, but it's pretty disinteresting, and if I were you, I really wouldn't care. It's not even 'good' drama, if there were such a thing...not only is it 8th grader drama, but it's boring 8th grader drama...I'm not dumb or immature enough for the juicy stuff. :)

So, naturally, we met outside the Build-a-Bear as usual. But this time, after everyone showed up, we actually decided to go in. We all pitched in to buy a bear that we're going to pass around between the five of us, named Triland. Some of us are being split up this year and going to different high schools...four of us are going to Triton in our area, some to Highland...what a clever combination, I know.

After we got 'her', along with an outfit that suits our clashing tastes perfectly, we headed for Hot Topic...four of us were having fun, one got scared in there. We went to Aeropostale next door. Three having fun, one neutral, one dying to get out(who ended up getting a hoodie there anyway, so she really has to be more open-minded). We went to Wet Seal....well, all were satisfied there. Blah, blah, blah...tried on hats at Macy's, took photobooth pictures, got a snowstorm from Kohr Bros. Ice Cream, got it stolen from me when one of them pointed behind me talking about a cute shirt in Penney's...yeah. I don't know how interesting this is to you, in fact I'm shocked you've gotten this far, but it was a significant part of my summer's end, so I figured I'd tell you all about it.

Well, we had some classic times yesterday. The five of us haven't been all together at once for a long time, and it was nice to finally all be free simultaneously. No matter how much of a loner I can be sometimes, I love them.

Now, Dexter is on. It's an addiction, so I'm going to watch.

Meghan Rene', Sarah Sinead, Charisse Louann, Meghan Elizabeth, Christina Marie. :)

Thunderstorms. (Thirteen days until school.)

"Quiet minds cannot be perplexed or frightened
but go on in fortune or misfortune at their own private pace, like a clock
during a thunderstorm."- Robert Louis Stevenson

Thunderstorms. I can't tell you how much I love them, live for them. Especially ones that creep up on you unexpectedly in the middle of the night. Shocker...it's 1:30 in the morning, there's endless downpour, lightning's bringing life to the world around me and deafening crackles of thunder are piercing my ears as I type away. I know so many people who hate such weather; they think it's ugly, terrifying. I don't know how they don't see the beauty in the disaster.

They have a general formula as to what you're supposed to expect, but yet you somehow never really know what to expect. You know what they're typically composed of, but that still doesn't make it definite...you still never really put you're full trust into it, because you never know if there's a catch. Sometimes they're simple...what some would call dull...but they definitely make up for it on other days. For example...right now. I'm in the midst of one of those raw ones...you know, the one's that aren't effing around, because they mean business. This lightning seems like it's too close for comfort...that's alright with me.

I'm going to go enjoy it until it winds down a bit so I can get some sleep without the craving for the chaos outside my window, combined with the slight fear for my life screaming from deep inside of me. Night.

*Listening to*: Remembering Sunday-ATL(ft. Juliet Simms)

It's Late-Queen

Light Up the Sky-Yellowcard

(huh...the last two sound like puns.)

Good Morning Starshine, the Earth says Hello!

Hola, the name's Christina. I blow out my candles on October 23, which makes me a raging scorpio. I've been told that I'm pretty much fourteen going on fifteen physically, fourteen going on forty mentally. I live in South Jersey, and when you sum everything up, I basically detest this state. My parents believe it was a mistake moving here, but personally, I believe that there's a reason why I was subjected to such small-mindedness from the time I was three. I know I'm not the only one, but I believe that everything does happen for a reason, so I don't really regret being here. I just know there's bigger and better things for me, for all of us, out there. My dad is originally from Queens, New York, and is a musician definitely worth checking out. Listen in at www.gunderman.tv. I graduated middle school in June, said very tearful goodbyes to those going separate ways, sucked it up and got psyched to go to high school. I'm definitely excited, not for the whole "high school experience", but because I have more options than ever regarding my education. I promise you that I will succeed, as long as I put my mind to it. Anyway, this is simply an introduction of sorts, and there will be many more, actually intriguing, posts up on here. This is a period of mental and emotional growth for me, and I'm getting ready to spread my wings and greet the world.